Friday, August 31, 2018

7 Random Reminders from a Funeral During Elul



  1. Late summer sunshine on the Hudson is spectacular. When you look, you can find the beauty in creation. It’s out there.
  2. Karma, for lack of a better word, exists. What you put out into the universe comes back to you.
  3. Get behind a cause you believe in to help repair our broken world.
  4. The people in your orbit matter. Surround yourself with an ever-widening circle of those who bring you joy and help you laugh, cope, and get the most from this life.
  5. A long, loving relationship is a holy thing. Those who have one truly are blessed.
  6. Kudos to whomever developed Jewish mourning rituals. The thud of dirt on a casket stings, but laughter, hugs, and sweet memories salve the wound a little bit each day. Don't pick at the scab.
  7. Healthy eating is a noble goal, but when grilled cheese is (the only thing) on the menu, eat up. Sometimes you have to feed your body and your soul. The hell with the carbs.

Saturday, August 11, 2018

5 Reasons I’m Not Participating in #BlogElul This Year

Dear #BlogElul,

I’m glad you’re here and I hope a lot of people blog for you this year, but I’m not going to be one of them. As I told someone who asked me recently about doing a freelance editing job that she needed turned around quickly, “I am on overload...and I can't take on one more thing.”

I #BloggedElul (#BlogEluled? #BlogElulled?) consistently and completely in 2016 and 2017 and it was a meaningful exercise each time, but here are five reasons I’ve opted not to participate this year.
  1. When Rosh HaShanah arrives, I’m exhausted. I spend the weeks leading up to the High Holidays writing and editing countless blog posts and lots of web content for ReformJudaism.org. Add in #BlogElul and by the time the first of Tishrei arrives, I have little, if any, spiritual bandwidth left to do the work the holidays require. 

  2. I need more downtime. Blogging well (and the over achiever in me likes to think my posts are well done) takes lots of thought and time. Ironically, I wrote this in a #BlogElul post in 2016: “As we begin a new week – the last one of 5776 – may I begin to see with my 5777 eyes: less judgmentally, more compassionately, less harshly, and more patiently. Even as my eyesight and my heart soften, may I also begin to say “no,” so there can be time in my life for me – to read, write, think, or just be alone with my soul.”

  3. I am tired of multi-tasking. Often, I eat a meal at the computer; flit back and forth between paying bills and reading emails; start a task, get distracted (usually by technology), and only return to it hours later. On video calls at work, too, I'm baffled by people's ability to listen to whomever is speaking, ask questions, offer opinions, keep abreast of (and participate in) side conversations in the chat box, and read related articles, websites, and more, the links to which others constantly share. I. Can't. Do. It. All. I want enough time to focus on one thing at a time, including #BlogElul –– and to do it without distractions and without interruptions.

  4. One a.m. is not a suitable bedtime. Two nights each week I work out with a trainer. It is simultaneously grounding, invigorating, and physically exhausting. By the time I shower, eat, and take care of whatever else demands attention, it is often much later than I’d like. I’ve been striving for lights-out at 10:30 p.m. on those nights – and on the nights in between – and I'd like to hit that mark at least a few times a week.

  5. “Let’s get together soon” has become an empty promise. Recently, I’ve run into a few neighbors and emailed with some former colleagues whose company I enjoy. We chat or email briefly before the conversation inevitably ends with “Let’s get together soon.” Sadly, it rarely happens. I want time and energy to fulfill those empty promises -- and others -- with face-to-face companionship.
I think the bottom line here is that I need and want to slow down, to stop burning the candle at both ends, to focus – one at a time (and in a non-selfish way) – on people and activities I know will be fulfilling and meaningful to me, and perhaps even have time to discover some new ones as well. I believe that doing so will lead to less frustration, fewer empty promises, more sleep, and more enjoyment of simple pleasures, all of which will help me be my best self in 5779.

Shana tova , #BlogElul… see you next year,
~ JanetheWriter

Inspired by Ima on (and off) the Bima, this #BlogElul post may be the only one I write marking the days of the Hebrew month of Elul, which precedes the Jewish High Holidays and traditionally serves as a time of reflection and spiritual preparation for the new year.