Sleep does not help if it’s your soul that’s tired.
I spent a lot of time during Elul and in the days since Rosh HaShanah taking an accounting of my soul.
My soul is tired.
Tired of being a single-tasker in a multi-tasking world.
Tired of video conference calls that make me feel dyslexic.
Tired of writing condolence notes -- especially for young people.
Tired of eating alone at my desk day after day – for a few extra minutes of work time.
Tired of invariably choosing the pew behind chatters and squirmers -- every year at this season.
Tired of the volume and vulgarity of America’s political discourse.
Tired of having someone pass off my work as her own.
Tired of too-loud talkers, too-loud music, and too-loud kiddies with oblivious moms.
Tired of being pushed and squished on the subway.
Tired of incessant texters -- and constantly dodging them.
Tired of unending consumerism, entitlement, and privilege turning a blind eye to hunger, homelessness, and poverty – and tired of being powerless to help right
Tired of technology’s ceaseless interruptions.
Tired of being bereft of things that promote quality of life and a touch of humanity: face-to-face meetings, apples and honey, thanks for a job well done, uninterrupted work time, morning greetings, communal space,
intellectual banter, inside voices, guidance, mentors, a voice, a presence, learning opportunities, creativity for its own sake, and a Shabbat shalom or two when Friday
finally rolls around.
My soul is tired – and I don’t know how or where to find the joy, the fun, the funny, the warmth, the camaraderie, the smile, the delight, or the gladness
that might bring it back to life.