When you walked by, I noticed that your left ankle turns in just like The Mums'. You have her posture, her body type, and you push your shopping cart just the way she did -- leaning down and into it for support. I wanted to like you, to catch a glimpse of your face, perhaps share a smile.
Until you pushed that shopping cart straight to the front of the "No Carts" check-out line -- as though none of us holding heavy hand baskets or sliding them forward with our feet as the line progressed was standing there, waiting patiently.
At first I thought you might be headed to pick out a greeting card or a bouquet of flowers beyond the cash registers. But then "Next on 6" rang out and you just ambled right over and started unloading your groceries.
Yup, you cut in front of everyone in line at 5:50 in the afternoon and nobody -- neither employees nor customers -- said anything.
Has the world hardened my heart so that I can't accept your need to go ahead of the rest of us?
Is my soul so calloused from five decades of hurts, injustices, and not-quite-healed bruises that I can't see past your flaws and foibles to accept you for whatever light or divine spark you bring to the world?
Can I accept -- for myself -- that your actions erase any good that I might otherwise see, or try to see, in you?
Can I accept -- again, just for me -- that when I finally got to check out at the register next to you, I only wanted to give you a dirty look?
And lastly, how can I tip the scale toward accepting you -- and away from judging you -- based solely on the sliver of the whole I happened to see today?
I don't think I know the answers, but pondering them and seeking them out is precisely why we have this month of preparation.
I hope you enjoy the goodies you bought in Fairway, and thanks, despite your actions, for some sweet reminders of The Mums.
Your fellow shopper,
~ JanetheWriter.
Inspired by Ima on (and off) the Bima,this #BlogElul post is one in a series marking the days of the Hebrew month of Elul, which precedes the Jewish High Holidays and traditionally serves as a time of reflection and spiritual preparation for the new year.
